The first photo was taken in August 2019. The second photo was taken recently. Can you believe they’re the same person? I was pretty fit in 2019. Now I am out of shape.
What happened to me? Well, a lot of things. COVID-19 happened. With everything cancelled, I stayed home and became much less active. With gyms closing and opening back up over and over again due to changing government regulations, I lost my habit of working out consistently. And then there was a lot of stress eating. Trying to find a job during the pandemic was hard. Everything during the pandemic was stressful. I’ve always been the type to eat my feelings, but the extreme stress led to extreme binge eating almost every day. These are all excuses; I could have had it together during the pandemic as many people have. But yeah, that’s what happened.
I gained about 30 kilograms. That’s 66 pounds for readers in USA. That is a lot of excess weight. Gaining weight made me feel worse, and I would resort to binge eating because of the stress, and I gained more weight, and the vicious cycle continued. Binge eating became a habit, so even after my depression improved, I kept overeating. That’s how I became obese. I am 158cm (5’2”) tall and I weigh 77kg (170lbs) now.
If I gained weight being happy and truly enjoying the food I ate, maybe I wouldn’t feel as bad about my body. But I gained weight because I was stressed. When I see my body, I equate the body fat with depression and chaos. I do not feel happy about it.
My health has declined. I get out of breath so easily. My skin became weak from being stretched thin. I actually had to go see a dermatologist because of the inflammation and he told me flat out, losing weight is the only way to alleviate it because my weight is the root cause of this symptom. And overeating junk food and not really exercising had me feeling lethargic. I wanted to change, but it wasn’t easy.
Things have improved for me. I did get a job, finally. My clinical psychologist and I worked on bettering my mental health. I now feel ready to make some serious changes for the sake of my physical health. In fact, I desperately need it.
I’ve been eating a bit healthier and started going back to the gym. I am eating fruits and protein, and trying to work out 5-6 times a week. I already feel better. I’ve lost about 4kg but I have 26 more to go. But I feel confident that I will get there one step at a time. In time I will look back and see how far I’ve come and feel proud of myself.
If you have been in the same rut, I encourage you to join me in this fitness journey. Let’s become the best version of ourselves and live our best lives.